Stuart Ashen as Ashens

Richard Sandling as Richard

Warwick Davis as Himself

Robert Llewellyn as The Professor

Victoria Broom as The Maiden in Black

Chris Kendall as Nemesis

Millie Reeves as Ashley

Emma Croft as Counter Girl

Dan Tomlinson as Geoffrey Excellence

Mawaan Rizwan as Iqbal / Mother Iqbal

Sule Rimi as Chef Brilliance

Louis Waymouth as Knighthood

Stuart Matthews as Security Guard

Fawn Mead as The Fan

Thomas Atherton as Prisoner

Richard Ball as Revis

Christopher Bingham as Spoonboy

Mathew Buck as Film Brain

Larry Bundy Jr. as Guru Larry

Dick Bush as Nurse

Kayleigh Cousins as Bar Girl

Luke Cutforth as Self

Simon Davis as Police Officer

Myles Dyer as Scientist

Kerry Gilbert as Marian

Ali Jardine as Hoodie

Conor Jatter as Hoodie