Ashley Tisdale as Jody Sanders

Simon Rex as Dan Sanders

Charlie Sheen as Charlie Sheen

Gracie Whitton as Kathy

Ava Kolker as Lily

Heather Locklear as Barbara

Molly Shannon as Heather Darcy

Josh Robert Thompson as Narrator (voice)

Darrell Hammond as Dr. Hall

Marisa Saks as Amy

Snoop Dogg as Marcus

Terry Crews as Martin Jacobs

Mike Tyson as Mike Tyson

Dylan Morris as Aidan

Ryan Morris as Aidan

Lidia Porto as Maria

Mac Miller as D'Andre

Erica Ash as Kendra Brooks

J.P. Manoux as Pierre

Marianne Hammock as Female Aide

Tyler Posey as David

Sarah Hyland as Mia

Shad Moss as Eric

Katrina Bowden as Natalie

Christopher 'Critter' Antonucci as Caesar

Scot Nery as Mama

Ben Cornish as Dom

Katt Williams as Blaine Fulda

Lewis Thompson as Madea

Lindsay Lohan as Self

Jerry O'Connell as Christian Grey

Usher as Ira the Janitor

Macsen Lintz as French Boy

John Atwood as Newscaster #1

Lane Carlock as Newscaster #2

Shereé Whitfield as Real Housewife #1

Angela Raiola as Real Housewife #2

Lil Duval as Kendra's Brother

Angie Stone as Kendra's Cousin

Jasmine Guy as Kendra's Mom

Ashley LeConte Campbell as Antoinette Beauchamp

Kate Walsh as Self

Clifton Guterman as Waiter

Anna Skidanova as Nadia

Clayton Landey as Sodomized Cop

Scott Rousseau as Santa

Maui Tisdale as Mama's Ridiculously Pampered Dog

Kendra Wilkinson as Self (uncredited)

Audrina Patridge as Self (uncredited)

Zoe Pessin as Honey Boo Boo (uncredited)

Emily Chandler Westergreen as Mara (uncredited)

Jwaundace Candece as Real Housewife (uncredited)

Angela Kerecz as Featured Porn Star (uncredited)

Aaron Beelner as Little Man (uncredited)

Elizabeth Davidovich as Ballerina (uncredited)

Amanda Jelks as Ballerina (uncredited)

Nikki Lashae as Ballerina (uncredited)

Amanda Topper as Ballet Dancer (uncredited)

Joel Rogers as Confused Ballet Patron (uncredited)

Jon Gould as Ballet Patron (uncredited)

Rory Healy as Bedroom Clown / Ballet Audience Member (uncredited)

Catherine A. Cospelich as Ape Chick (uncredited)

Moses Das as Bridge Runner (uncredited)

Faith Blankenship as Carpet Girl (uncredited)

Jeff Glover as Lab Tech (uncredited)

Sandy Simmons as Model (uncredited)

Kendrick Cross as Rescue Worker (uncredited)

Leigh Hennessy as Witch (uncredited)

Chris Durfy as Packer Fan (uncredited)

David Zucker as Packer Fan (uncredited)

Memi West as Audience / Patron (uncredited)

Dathan Thigpen as Extra (uncredited)