Mark Wahlberg as John Bennett

Mila Kunis as Lori Collins

Seth MacFarlane as Ted (voice)

Joel McHale as Rex

Giovanni Ribisi as Donny

Patrick Warburton as Guy

Matt Walsh as Thomas

Jessica Barth as Tami-Lynn

Aedin Mincks as Robert

Bill Smitrovich as Frank

Patrick Stewart as Narrator (voice)

Norah Jones as Norah Jones

Sam J. Jones as Sam Jones

Tom Skerritt as Tom Skerritt

Bretton Manley as Young John

Ralph Garman as John's Dad

Alex Borstein as John's Mom

John Viener as Alix

Laura Vandervoort as Tanya

Robert Wu as Asian Man "Ming"

Ginger Gonzaga as Gina

Jessica Stroup as Tracy

Melissa Ordway as Michelle

Max Harris as Greenbaum Kid

Zane Cowans as Kid #1 / Young Ted's Voice

T.J. Hourigan as Kid #2

Owen Clarke as Kid #3

Kristina Ellery as Heavenly

Katelyn Lorren as Cherene

Chanty Sok as Angelique

Sarah Fischer as Sauvignon Blanc

Cassie Djerf as Waitress

Joe Siriani as Guy at Table #1

Pat Shea as Guy at Table #2

Josh Duvendeck as Guy #1

Chris Cox as Guy #2

Henry Penzi as Partygoer (Ted's Buddy)

Tania Cabrera as Girl at Party

Colton Shires as Teenage John

Viera Andrea Moya as Plymouth PR Worker

Heajee Kim as Club Girl

Lydia Hannibal as Ellen

Shawn Thornton as Crazy Guy

Eric Weinstein as Stagehand

Danny Smith as Waiter

Mike Nikitas as Newscaster

Robin Hamilton as Female Newscaster

Mike Henry as Southern Newscaster

Johnny Lee Davenport as Husband

Chris Everett as Wife

Tara Strong as Bellybutton (voice) (uncredited)

Ted Danson as Ted Danson (uncredited)

Ryan Reynolds as Jared (uncredited)

Olivia Jordan as Party Guest (uncredited)

Alexandra Creteau as Club Patron (uncredited)

Emmalyn Anderson as Concert Attendee (uncredited)

John Franchi as Tourist / Pedestrian (uncredited)

Ronald Boone as Liberty Mechanic (uncredited)